(Source: ourmostbrilliantfriends)
handle-your-shit-people-please:
Most of my life choices
(Source: ruinedchildhood)
why can’t a t-rex clap? because it’s dead
too soon
How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his Family.
WHAT
A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks “why the long face?”
The horse replies “my wife has terminal cancer”
what’s worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it?
the holocaust
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a truck.
(Source: chickensandwich)
(Source: billyisacunt)
(Source: born--for--this)